What Strategies Help Manage a Narcissistic Spouse During an Illinois Divorce?

 Posted on September 26, 2025 in Divorce

Divorce is rarely easy, but divorcing a narcissist can be especially challenging. A narcissistic spouse may refuse to compromise, try to manipulate situations, or even use the court system as a tool for control. As you prepare yourself for a high-conflict divorce, consider speaking with an experienced Chicago, IL divorce lawyer. With legal assistance, you can better prepare for the challenges ahead.

Recognizing Common Narcissist Tactics During Divorce

There is a pattern to the way that narcissists tend to behave during the divorce process. Sometimes, they hide assets. They may also file constant motions to slow the process. Illinois judges recognize that these behaviors create unnecessary conflict, and they have the authority to address them. For example, under 750 ILCS 5/503, all marital property must be divided fairly. If a spouse hides money or property, the court can reopen the case and award that property to the other spouse.

Another common tactic is using children as pawns. Your spouse may try to gain sole custody or harm your child’s relationship with you. Illinois law recognizes that this behavior is harmful, and in keeping with 750 ILCS 5/602.5, the court must make parenting decisions based on what serves your child’s best interests. They do not factor in your spouse’s need for control. They want to see that both parents encourage a healthy relationship between the child and the other parent.

Tips for Managing Divorce With a Narcissist

There are practical steps you can take to reduce conflict and protect yourself during the divorce process:

• Keep communication clean: Stick to the facts and avoid being pulled into arguments. Parenting apps or written communication can help.

• Document everything: Save texts, emails, financial records, and notes about any incidents of manipulation or intimidation.

• Set firm boundaries: If your spouse tries to contact you inappropriately, discuss protective options with your lawyer. In serious cases, an order of protection under 750 ILCS 60/214 may be granted.

• Prioritize your children: Support your children emotionally and avoid making negative comments about their other parent in front of them. If you notice your spouse trying to turn them against you, talk to your attorney immediately.

• Rely on professional guidance: Work closely with your attorney and, when needed, mental health professionals who can provide additional support.

How an Illinois Lawyer Can Help You Navigate Divorce With a Narcissist

An experienced divorce lawyer understands the unique challenges of high-conflict cases. You can ask your lawyer to file motions that reduce unnecessary court filings and request sanctions if your spouse acts in bad faith. Your lawyer can also push for parenting plans that limit opportunities for conflict and manipulation.

Attorneys also know how to gather and present evidence effectively. For example, if your spouse has been hiding assets, your attorney may request financial discovery or bring in forensic accountants. If parenting time is disputed, your lawyer can point out to the court any behaviors that are not in your child’s best interests.

Talk to an Experienced Cook County, IL High Conflict Divorce Attorney

Divorcing a narcissistic spouse can be challenging. You need the support of a knowledgeable team that has experience handling high-conflict divorce. At The Law Office of George J. Skuros, we focus on helping clients understand the legal issues they face so they are prepared to move forward. We want you to know what to expect while we fight for the best possible outcome.

Attorney George Skuros offers experience and dedication to every case. Call 312-884-1222 today and schedule a free consultation with a Chicago, IL divorce lawyer you can trust.